[Diaspora] Call for Errata

[Mark Delsing]

On Jan 12, 2010, at 12:26 PM, C. W. Marshall wrote:

> Please send any errata to me, or post them here. We will consider  
> all suggestions until January 29.

Here is a complete list of what I found. It includes some stuff I've  
sent before, but I figure it's good to have it all in one document.  
Please keep in mind that some of these changes are just my former  
English major self coming out.

Possible Errata:

p. xi, "But the blood the flowed through Lawrence's veins..."
Should be "But the blood that flowed through...."

p.4, "There are no necessary mechanical Consequences of this..."
"Consequences" should possibly not be capitalized since this is  
speaking generally, not about Consequences as in the damage mechanic.

p.9, "by the time the turn comes back to whoever generated it..."
Perhaps should be "back to whomever"?

p.14 "Faster-than-light travel between stars only occur along these  
paths."
Should be "only occurs along".

p.24, near the top: "(war, pollution, botched terraforming...)"
Is an ellipsis needed here? Maybe end with "etc" rather than trail off.

p.27, "Or just let you book  passage?"
Looks like there's an extra space between "book" and "passage".

p.28, near the bottom, "Interests of the system is determined..."
Should be "are determined".

p.29, last paragraph, "Due to the hazardous natural of the  
planetoids..."
Should be "hazardous nature of".

p.29, last paragraph, "Robotics run many of the factories..."
Verb should be "runs" if speaking of the science of robotics.
If "robotics" is supposed to be some sort of plural (assuming a  
"robotic" is a single robot for some reason), then it's fine as-is.

p.47
"...a character with such a Stunt to also have Assets 1 in her Skill  
pyramid."
The character in question would need to have Assets in her pyramid to  
utilize the Stunt (Swap a Skill). Redundant?

p.48
"Combat medic... bonus on  rolls..."
Extra space before "rolls" needs to be removed.

p.69
"Typical destination inside a system will be around that number..."
Should read: "Typical destinations inside..."

p.71
"It’s not a reward granted by the referee to player characters but is  
instead integral to the character each player has intended."
Awkward? Maybe, "as each player has intended"?

"A failure does generate a hit..."
Awkward? "A failure generates a hit..." seems simpler.

p.73 (example)
"A moderate Consequence can be cleared by anyone (including the  
character) with an Assets check against difficulty one..."
Peeve. Throughout the book, target numbers and modifiers are often  
written out, e.g. "four" instead of "4". My gut wants any reference to  
dice and target numbers to be actual numbers. I think it makes  
scanning for rule text easier. Just a thought.

p.74
"That's a Assets check of 5 and Bendigo..."
Should read: "...an Assets check..."

p.75
"The ship needs to roll it’s Trade Skill against a target value of  
zero..."
Should read: "...roll its Trade Skill..."

"If the ship has spent more than travel time to and from a slipknot..."
Should maybe read: "...more than the travel time..."

p.76
"The effects of speculative cargo may have a positive or negative  
value: roll the dice, and apply –2 to the Trade roll..."
I kind of balked at "roll the dice." What dice? Maybe be explicit and  
say "make a Trade roll, and..."

p.82
"But there is an atmosphere, that is breathable..."
Should read: "But there is an atmosphere that is breathable..."

"...(who refer to themselves simply as "the People" begins in the  
dark..."
Should read: "...(who refer to themselves simply as "the People")  
begins in the dark..."

p.83
"Recently Saang developed the technology to properly explore their  
system, as they ventured out..."
Should read: "Recently Saang developed the technology to properly  
explore their system. As they ventured out..."

"Ships they didn't know exist but knew shouldn't be there."
Should read: "Ships they didn't know existed but knew shouldn't be  
there."

"Saang may be an up and coming power..."
Should read: "Saang might be..."

'pushing into the heavens'
'explore the lore'
I guess I wanted to see double-quotes around these, given other  
examples of similar usage in the book.

"However it remains to be seen..."
Should read: "However, it remains to be seen..."

"Branch Sokju current hold the most power..."
Should read: "Branch Sokju current holds the most power..."

"Jjan Migukk push forward Saang's unquestioned right..."
Should read: "Jjan Migukk pushes forward Saang's unquestioned right..."

The "Stealing Supplies" paragraph is awkward. Possible alternative:
"Stealing Supplies: the outer reaches of the Saang system are ripe for  
the taking, and a few other people are doing just that. Without any  
real law in the system (since Saang is incapable of policing its  
space), the players can make some quick cash by raiding a mining  
colony of its hoard and selling it out-of-system to the highest bidder."

p.84
"...mineral rights or some other thing of value (referees get  
creative!) The players..."
Should read: "...mineral rights or some other thing of value  
(referees, get creative!). The players..."

p.86
"...Gravity's rainbow, stretches between LaGrange points..."
Should read: "...Gravity's Rainbow stretches between LaGrange points..."

p.87
"With the surplus came scientific advancement, the world realized it  
was no longer the centre of the galaxy but it seemed the stars were  
there for the searching."
Should (possibly) read: "With the surplus came scientific advancement.  
The world realized it was no longer the centre of the galaxy, but it  
seemed the stars were there for the searching."

'the good old days'
Double quotes again?

"Cho Mal remains a treasure trove to be uncovered, what loot..."
Should read: "Cho Mal remains a treasure trove to be uncovered. What  
loot..."

p.88
"wasn't always this...lush"
Should read: "wasn't always this ... lush" (according to Bringhurst).

p.91
"...shattered Quantii's control and a hoard of software."
Should read: "...shattered Quantii's control and had a hoard of  
software."

"...the only splistream-capable system past its prime."
Should maybe read: "...their only splistream-capable system past its  
prime."

p.92
"I found the ship, and it still worked: there weren't many left that  
could put out these speeds: none of the the People could produce them."
One too many colons, methinks. Honestly, almost everywhere you guys  
use a colon, I wold use a semicolon. :)
Could maybe read: "I found the ship, and it still worked. There  
weren't many left that could put out these speeds: none of the the  
People could produce them."

p.93
"(Hopefully a city)!"
Should read: "(Hopefully a city!)"

p.96
"Any borders between zones that is especially difficult to cross..."
Should read: "Any borders between zones that are especially difficult  
to cross..."

p.99
"The maximum range characters can engage in is one zones regardless of  
the number of zones in the level."
Should read: "The maximum range characters can engage in is one zone  
regardless of the number of zones in the level."

p.101
"Combat is organized into turns of non-specific length, but each  
representing something between twenty seconds and a minute, depending  
on the actions described. Consequently, it may be assumed that more is  
happening within each round than is actually being described, and in a  
given round..."
Turns? Rounds? Based on later usage, I think all references to "round"  
need to be changed to "turn".

"Both attack and defense rolls may now be modified by invoked Aspects,  
tagged Aspects, spin (though only one of each type: see Playing with  
Fate) and any other available modifier."
BOth the use of "type" and the placement of the parenthetical is  
confusing.
Try this instead: "Both attack and defense rolls may now be modified  
by invoked or tagged Aspects (though only one from each scope: see  
Playing with Fate), spin and any other available modifier."

p.102
Sidebar: "It might not be clear to how phrase actions..."
Should read: "It might not be clear how to phrase actions..."

p.103
"... moved through with one turns' expenditure..."
Should read: "... moved through with one turn's expenditure..."

"He rolls a zero, which added to his agility..."
Should read: "He rolls a zero, which added to his Agility..."

"(Thorvald has Vehicle 3, but he specializes in water vehicles)"
I can't figure out why this is mentioned.

p.105
"...moving a boudoir in front of a hotel room door..."
Boudoir: "a woman's bedroom or private sitting room." That's some  
serious Stamina!

p.107
"Consequently all Health and Composure stress track hits are cleared  
at the first instance of downtime..."
Should read: "Consequently, all Health and Composure..."

p.110
"In these cases a loss of suit integrity (any Health track  
Consequence) has serious ramifications.
A hostile environment suit has lost integrity when the wearer takes  
any Health track Consequence."
Necessary to repeat the suit integrity rules like this?

p.114
"These will have the Thrown Stunt and they get to be re-used  
indefinitely, as with a firearm or laser."
Thrown weapons can be re-used indefinitely? I am confused.

p.117
Does Power Suit need to be its own Stunt? Is there ever a case where  
armour will have this Stunt and no other Power Suit Stunts?

pp.118-119
The tables in general seem to order their notes sections differently.  
Sometimes Aspects and Stunts are grouped with each other, sometimes  
not, and the order varies.

p.118
Some of the Brawling weapons have Aspects and Stunts, despite p.113  
stating, "Brawling weapons do not have Aspects or Stunts."

Q: Knives are modal? Not free modal?

The self-loading pistol's notes say "choose a mode as an action."  
Shouldn't this just say "modal"?

p.119
The Stunts for the battlesuit seem to be in the wrong order compared  
to other examples, e.g., "power suit" and the power suit stunts are  
separated in the list.

The low-velocity pistol's notes say "choose a mode as an action."  
Shouldn't this just say "modal"?

Pulse laser pack through hand flamer entries each have an extra space  
after "low recoil".

Neural disruptor's "non-lethal" Stunt should read "non lethal".

p.121
#6 introduces the concept of opposed Maneuver rolls, though this is  
never mentioned in the rules for Maneuvers on p.103. I like opposed  
Maneuvers, but regardless, these two spots need to be reconciled.

"Seal a suit... Composure and health track hit..."
"Health" should be capitalized.

"Create an obstruction" entry #6: Is it necessary to say "(2/2/2)"?

p.124
"...(see sidebar on “Social Initiative”)."
There is no sidebar on Social Initiative in the book. "Sidebar" =  
"section"?

p.132
"Ship's may have a Stunt (Vector Randomizer) that changes the base  
from 0 to 2."
Should read: "Ships may have a Stunt (Vector Randomizer) that changes  
the base from 0 to 2."

"A ship with a Beam Skill can attack at a value from 1 up to the full  
Beam rating. ...  He may apply any value from 1 to the full Beam  
rating."
Repetitive?

p.133
The torpedoes section never explains what torpedoes are, unlike the  
beams section. No idea if this is intentional or not.

p.132-133
It is never stated which stress track beams and torpedoes target.  
Later inference seems to be Frame, but it is never stated explicitly.

p.135
"Remember that at any time during the fight but before damage is  
marked, any spacecraft owner may negotiate a concession rather than  
play out."
Isn't it technically "before a ship is Taken Out"? Otherwise, players  
could always concede when a hit they can't mitigate is taken.

p.138
"In the turn in which any ship is moved to band 0, and there is at  
least one other ship at band 0, the ship entering the band may enter  
formation with another ship."
Should this read, "with the other ship" or something similarly more  
specific? The ship can only form with other ships at band 0, right?

"...the pirates board the target, while the characters in their ship  
maneuver about)."
The ending period should be inside the closing parenthesis: "...about.)"

p.148
"Designed to operate with the Wild Weasel..."
The Wild Who? Is this a reference to the T2 Electronic Warfare  
Platform on p.147?

p.141, p.143, p.147, p.148, p.151, p.152, p.154
All of the entries for Vector Randomizer are formatted or phrased  
differently. Which one is the right one?

p.151
The Scout Hunter has the Stunt, "T3 Slipdrive". None of the other  
ships attach a technology rating to their Slipdrive Stunt.

p.157
"4. Ship's Torpedo roll for each ship that declared a missile target..."
Should be "torpedo target" perhaps?

p.161
"...(Dealing with Time, Chapter 2)..."
Different format form other references, which are typically, "(see  
Chapter 2, Dealing with Time)".

p.164
"...dependent on the player's specific resources as a would-be lover."
I'm pretty sure you mean the *character's* specific resources. Unless  
we're talking about influencing the GM... :)

p.165
"The usual rules for tagging Aspects apply: you may tag only one of  
each category of Aspect..."
Should be: "...tag only one Aspect from each scope..."

p.166
"For a move action, the player rolls 4dF + Skill, then modify by any  
Aspects tagged or invoked."
Should read: "...then modifies by any Aspects..."

"...if he gets Simon to a target zone and keep him there..."
Should read: "...and keeps him there..."

p.169
"...and if the associated stress track takes hit in a fight during  
that session..."
Should read: "...and if the associated stress track takes hits in a  
fight during that session..."

p.170
"He speaks to the working class heart..."
Should be "Working Class" if we are speaking about the WC pseudo- 
character.

p.171
"...the tendency towards conservatism and order (Culture/Tech)  
effectively."
Should read: "...the tendency towards conservatism and order (Culture/ 
Tech, effectively)."

p.172
"...they realize that with the working class..."
Should be "Working Class" if we are speaking about the WC pseudo- 
character.

"...Noble ear, organize a general strike"
Should read: "...Noble ear, that they organize a general strike".  
Sentence as a whole does not make sense otherwise.

pp.171-172
It reads like Culture/Tech is being rolled like any other Skill in the  
"changing history" example. I thought that Culture/Tech was never  
actually rolled (" it is not something that is subject to rolls," p.  
42).

p.174
"2. For each player, callers asks for..."
Should read: "2. For each player, caller asks for..."

Lots of different usage of periods on this page; some entries end with  
them and some don't.

p.179
"(Chapter 5, Personal Combat)"
Should read: "(see Chapter 5, Personal Combat)" to be consistent, I  
think.

p.183
"Infantry units represented a small number of individuals of similar  
or concerted equipment..."
Should read: ""Infantry units represent a small number..."

p.184
"Artillery can only fire on targets that are in line-of-sight to a  
friendly unit that is currently attached to a platoon (or does not  
need to be) and has no Out Of Communications (OOC) counters."
Called "Out Of Communication (OOC) counters" on p.182. Which is right?

p.185
"A leader unit may perform a  action in addition to its normal action.  
It may, therefore, make two  actions in a turn."
Extra spaces (looks like) between "a action" and "two actions".

The Typical Units section uses the term "Skill tree," which is not  
used elsewhere. I'd think for each respective unit you'd want to say  
"Skill pyramid" or "Skill column," as applicable.

p.186
"Indirect Fire 3, Camouflage 2, Movement 1. artillery’s immediate  
objective is to destroy spotted enemy equipment."
Should read: "...Movement 1. Artillery’s immediate objective..."

p.187
"It may use its Indirect Fire Skill to effect Jam attacks..."
I don't think "Jam" is elsewhere capitalized when mid-sentence.

p.189
"The objective of the rule that makes you pause for a compel after  
every zone moved, is to..."
Should read: "...after every zone moved is to..."

p.190
"Roll any Skill and suppply some narration to describe the effect."
Only two P's in "supply".

p.191
"Roll Camouflage against a target value of zero and reduce any SPOTTED  
markers on the unit by the number of hits achieved."
Should read: "...shifts achieved."

p.192
"A single character stand..."
p.193
"...the primary value of a character attached to a stand is.."
What's a stand?

p.194
"A dug in force attempts..."
Should read: "A dug-in force attempts..."

pp.192-202
The Technology Enhancement Stunt is formated in different ways for  
different units. Some write it out, some use numbers, some capitalize  
Skills, some don't.  Which one is right?

p.199
RAP Coilgun's Skills are formatted differently from most other entries.

p.202
Heavy howitzer platoon's Skills are formatted differently from most  
other entries.

p.204
"...to reconsider their profession...or enlist."
Should be spaces around ellipsis, according to Bringhurst.

p.205
"...which are opposed rolls, and so put as lower skill."
Should read: "...which are opposed rolls, and so put as lower Skills."

p.206
"...for when going up against..."
Should maybe read: "...for when we're going up against..."

The "Relentless advance" Aspect should be a the end of the Mobile  
Bridge stat block to match other entries.

"...(higher values wold still be eroded in the regular way)..."
Pass values are not eroded in platoon combat, according to p.181.

p.209
"Each Consequence reduces the shifts by two..."
Contradicts p.192, which has platoon consequences using the standard  
1/2/4.

"Roll any Skill + narrative..."
This just seems weird to me. "+ narrative"? I'd just use the phrasing  
on p.190.

"Roll Camouflage against a target value of zero and reduce any SPOTTED  
markers on the unit by the number of hits achieved."
Should read: "...shifts achieved."


p.212
"...their characters "about" that conflict."
Should be posessive "characters'" if I understand this sentence  
correctly.

p.220
"...what the actual goals of each party..."
Should be "what the actual goals are" or "what are the actual goals".

p.223
"Some range could be modeled perhaps by allowing attacks at range 0-1,  
but doing only damage 1."
What does "damage 1" mean? The attack only ever does 1 stress? Or  
should this read "harm 1" or "penetration 1"?

"As a maneuver, use Psionics, to put an Aspect on nearby individuals..."
Remove comma after "Psionics".

p.225
"...all other Aspects of maneuver are based..."
Lower-case "aspects" since it is being used generally, not in  
reference to FATE Aspect mechanics.

p.226
"All stats start at value zero and can be increase by 1bp/stat point..."
Change to "can be increased by".

"Stats at or below zero indicate a component that cannot be used  
offensively."
FWIW, this is the only place this rule is mentioned; it never comes up  
in the Starship Combat chapter.

p.227
"...as long as Pilot, and Navigation are represented..."
Remove comma; should read "Pilot and Navigation are".

"Vector randomizer: Defense 2 versus Beam
Firewall: Defense 2 versus EW
Point Defense:Defense 2 versus Torpedoes"
Periods at the end of these?

"Interface Vehicle" entry needs a closing period after "1bp".

p.228
"Fighters may be launched in any combat phase that the parent ship  
chooses not to act when it otherwise could do so."
Maybe should read, "any combat phase in which the parent ship chooses".

pp.229-234
The personal weapon design section lists costs differently form the  
other sections, using three variants: "Cost Xbp", "Cost: Xbp", and  
"Costs Xbp". Should be aligned with other sections, i.e., just "Xbp"  
at the end of each entry.

p.230
"...using the Agility Skill,  at range 1-2."
Looks like there is an extra space before "at range".

"Weapon has the, “Out of ammo” Aspect..."
Remove comma; should read "Weapon has the “Out of ammo” Aspect...".

"Two-handed: weapons is designed..."
Should read: "weapon is designed..."

p.231
"Makes the weapon available to those without the Military-grade Stunt  
for slug throwers."
Initial-caps needed for "Slug Throwers" as I assume the Skill is being  
referenced.

p.232
"Concealed Weapon: automatic Aspect on anyone with a weapon with  
minimum range 0."
Should read: "...automatic Aspect on any weapon with..." These are  
Aspects on weapons, not their wielders, right?

p.235
"Flexible... allowing greater mobility, increasying the Agility  
penalty by 1."
This is correct in the SRD ("decreasing the Agility penalty"), but not  
the book.

Same goes for "Lightweight" Stunt.

p.236
"Crushing fists" and "Armoured penetrators": "His Brawling also does  
normal lethal damage rather than Composure damage (unless he prefers  
otherwise)."
Brawling does normally do lethal damage unless the character is  
untrained. I assume this Stunt lets untrained Brawling do lethal  
damage as well. Maybe specifically mention that is a benefit of the  
Stunt? You could probably drop "His" as well.

"Armour with a Defense value that cost more than (4+T) and does not  
have the Lightweight Stunt..."
Should read: "Defense value hat costs more than..."

"Armour with the Stunt Power Suit also gets the Aspect, "Out of  
Juice," which..."
Should read: "Out of juice".

"...also gets the Aspect "Industrial Equipment.""
Should read: "Industrial equipment."

"Armour with a Defense value higher than tech level..."
Higher than what tech level? Its own? Should maybe read: "higher that  
its tech level".

p.237
"He was excited, and he returned his telescope."
Should read: "...and he returned to his telescope."

p.238
"The Minister of Science and Defense, Abraham Tucker became very  
rich..."
Should read: "The Minister of Science and Defense, Abraham Tucker,  
became very rich..."